Positive language is a tool with an enormous potential to reduce conflict, improve communication and inculcate the right attitude. It is even capable of changing an individual’s line of thought. However, positive language needs to be put more into practice.
In the second part of this lesson, we learnt about the neurochemistry of negativity in conversations. In this lesson, we will learn about positivity and how you can integrate it into your conversations.
Take this lesson to learn more and don’t forget to take the accompanying quiz at the end of this lesson.
Happy Learning!
Format
This lesson is in video format.
Transcript Provided
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Consider the following examples.
1. ‘You failed to provide the information, so we cannot help you here.’
2. ‘You claim that you sent us the quote, but we cannot find it. No doubt you’ll understand that we are unable to respond to you.’
In example 1, the tone of the sentence suggests the customer’s apparent carelessness has annoyed the speaker.
In example 2, the use of the phrase ‘You claim’ suggests the speaker thinks the customer is lying. The phrase ‘No doubt’ smacks of sarcasm.
Positive language is the antidote to providing our customers and stakeholders with such an experience, and here is what it looks like in action:
1. Avoid ‘you’ statements. Use ‘I’ or ‘We’ statements, instead
‘I’ statements are statements where the speaker is indicating her or his difficulty at something. ‘You’ statements, on the other hand, point out to a lapse or error on the customer’s part. ‘You’ statements, consequently, they sound accusatory.
So, the statement ‘You failed to provide the information…” can be rephrased as “I haven’t received the information as yet”
And the statement “You claim that you sent us the quote, but we cannot find it,” can be rephrased as “I hear you when you say you’ve sent the quote. We just can’t seem to locate.”
2. Emphasize what you (or your company) can do (and not what cannot or will not happen)
Show a willingness to help.
Both these examples contain negative words such as ‘cannot’ and ‘unable’ and are bad practice in business. This is poor communication practice.
A positive reworking of the two examples might run as follows.
‘If you can send it to us we will help… ‘
‘If we could get a copy of the quotation, we’ll be able to….’
By focusing on what you will do or what will happen, you leave a more positive impression on the recipient’s mind. It results in a little oxytocin burst in their mind and consequently leaves them with a better experience of interacting with you.
3. Highlight positive consequences
Instead of focusing on the mistakes of the past, and the stalemates it involves, it might be better to focus on positive future outcomes.
So, for instance, ‘We cannot help you on this occasion’ sounds like a conversation ender – one that leaves the customer hanging. Faced with such an outcome, customers will likely get defensive and/ or retaliate.
However, if you focus on what can happen if the customer complies with your request, it offers the customer a sense of hope. That line could thus be worded as ‘If we could get a copy from you, we’ll be able to process this transaction on priority, and minimize any time lost.”
